moving on

It’s been pretty quiet around here, and after today that may continue for a while.  Right now the life that usually lends itself to documentation is demanding all of me, leaving me no reserves to devote to the role of spectator.  The more I feel myself present in the moments of my life the more I question the impulse to document them, anyway.  Yes, I want to capture birthdays and anniversaries and special “just because” moments on camera.  No, I don’t think there’s any harm in posting crafts and home décor projects on my blog. But for a while everything in my life—dinner with friends, dates with Lovey, walks in the park, trips to see family—was subject to the question, “Can I blog about this?”

So I’ve taken a step back and asked some different questions: Why am I blogging? What do I want to share and what do I want to keep private? Why are people reading my blog? What should I do next?

I’m still sorting out what shape I want this blog to take in the future. I know I want to continue because I need to keep writing. I enjoy this format, but the content may change a little. I’ll let you know when I figure it out.

For now, the big news is that we’re moving! We spent a marathon day looking at houses—some cuter than others—and signed a lease on the very last one we looked at. It’s a duplex, a brick Cape Code from the 40s, and I’m going to love it! It took us a while to get there, though.

The first place we viewed was a shiny new condo, and while it was nice—NEW!!!—its floorplan was weird and it lacked personality.

new condoBesides that, the guy detailing his car in the parking lot was blasting Foreigner’s “I’ve Been Waiting For a Girl Like You,” which I had to listen to Lovey sing for the next couple hours because, let’s face it, that song gets stuck in your head. (I’m going to have it stuck in my head again now that I’ve written about it!) I don’t know how long I could overhear a neighbor’s 80s ballads without going batty.

After that we visited a duplex with one of the most awkward kitchens I’ve ever seen. I kept tilting my head this way and that, trying to imagine myself cooking dinner somehow. All I could picture was my future self feeling really frustrated.

wonky kitchenThen a few red flags came into play: the owner was currently living there–“between tenants,” he said—and wanted us to push back our move-in date by two weeks. No way, because work starts two days after our move-in date! Then he offered us some furniture, which I politely turned down. He smiled and said, “Okay; I’ll just store it in the basement, then.”  The basement, which is part of the unit he was trying to rent to us. No, landlord, you will not be storing things in a place where I’m paying you to store my things. Sorry. Next appointment!

That one was a bust too. Its layout was the absolute worst: split level but instead of up-down, the stairs went up-sideways: up led to two bedrooms and a bathroom; down led to a living room with a kitchen behind it. Between tiny closets and room-sized but practically inaccessible crawlspaces, I knew that figuring out where to put things would be a minor nightmare. And did I mention the whole unit smelled like dirty diapers and Renuzit?

That was bad enough, but the next one was so sketchy we almost didn’t go in. The realtor/owner seemed bored and indifferent; he was brisk with me on the phone and after the handshakes when we came in the door he ignored us and went back to scrubbing the stove. Let’s just say that place needed more than scrubbing.  Add to that the fact that it sat on a busy street, across from a gas station and a stone’s throw from dollar stores, PayDay Loans, and rundown ethnic restaurants, we were pretty sure this was not our kind of neighborhood. We asked about it and got this helpful response, “Well, I don’t know what you’re used to but there’s a lot worse.”  Um, thanks for your time!

We ventured back to a quieter neighborhood for our next appointment, where a realtor showed the property to us and another prospective renter at the same time. We eavesdropped from the bedrooms for the answers to her questions about the neighbors, tried to pretend we weren’t sizing up her fitness as a renter at the same time we sized up the fitness of the rental itself, and squeezed past her in little doorways as we switched between rooms, all with good manners despite the strangeness of the situation.

brick duplexThe peculiar perk of that house: a closet with a shelf so deep it ran behind the next room. (“What would I put up there?” I wondered. And, more importantly, “How would I ever reach it again?” The realtor suggested that it would be the ideal spot to stash a Christmas tree.) The drawback: a creepy, dark basement with rafters that touched Lovey’s hair.

We were a little dejected and completely exhausted by the time we reached the last landlord. When she emerged from her car I saw she was wearing a paint-stained button-up and pink Crocs. I wasn’t sure what to think about that. The first unit she showed us made me think we’d wasted our whole day. We were going to have to call ShinyCondo guy and pay handsomely to live in a place neither of us found inspiring. I just could not abide the more-than-roughed-up linoleum, dark brown wrinkled carpet, and rusted tub I was seeing. (Those were all in different rooms, by the way.)

“Please let the next one be better!” I prayed. I couldn’t imagine a landlord who owned a unit as bad as what we’d just seen also having one so much better that I’d be willing to sign a line for it, but sometimes hope is all you have, right?

Well, hope does not disappoint. There it was, with its curved walkway, blue door, and shutters. There it was, with its dogwood scattering white confetti on the back deck.

1940s cape cod houseInside we found one of the least-disastrous kitchens we’d seen all day—still small, sans dishwasher, but I’m taking Homemaker as my next job title, so whatever. Handwashing it shall be. And small is no change: so far small kitchens have been my lot in life.

We’ll have a living room/office for Lovey and a craft room/writer’s nest for me.  The master bedroom has his-and-hers closets and a dormer. (A dormer!)

Of course, this house also has a creepy basement, which just goes to show that even with all its charm it isn’t perfect. But for the next few years it will be home. Scrub brushes, paint, curtains, and lamps will go a long way toward making this borrowed place feel like ours for a while. I promise to show you some of those projects. Until then, thanks for your patience while I make a champion Goodwill pile and box up whatever’s left.

shopping nitty-gritty

I’ve always assumed that there are two ways to shop: my list-and-research intensive way and the “no questions asked” way.  By “no questions asked” I mean she wants something; she runs to the store; she buys it, not really caring what it costs.  I assumed that, by contrast, everyone watching their budget did another set of things (the same things I do) but now I don’t think that anymore.  I’ve had a couple recent conversations with friends I consider to be good shoppers, by which I mean they dress stylishly without breaking the bank.  But their habits are different from mine and each other’s.  So I thought I’d share my strategies with you, then hopefully you’ll share yours with me!

LISTS!

Color

Hold onto your hats, ladies; you are about to think I am certifiably insane.  I have a list of all the items I own, organized by color.  A few weeks ago I printed it out in the tiniest font I can read (6 or 8 pt, I think) and attached each color’s list to the back of its paint chip in my little wardrobe-at-a-glance guide.

color swatches color swatches with clothing inventory

So, for example, when I was in the dressing room debating the wisdom of purchasing these navy blue shorts with little white dots…

navy short shorts

…I flicked through my paint chip guide and read from the back that I had: an embellished olive tee, a spruce green tee, a gray tee, an emerald sweater, a mustard tank, a mustard shell, a mustard sweater, a red-and-white striped tee, a hot pink/red tee, a beige tee, and a beige-and-white striped tee that I could pair with these new bottoms.  So, yes!  Shorts, come home with me.

I know making a list like that sounds nuts.  It took me a couple hours, and I admit I felt kind of stupid sitting on the edge of the bed furiously scribbling down the name of every clothing and accessory item I own.*  Stupid partly because before I could scribble down the name I had to come up with a name–one good enough that, from a far-off dressing room where I’d have to imagine the item paired with potential purchases, I could remember salient details, like the fact that the gray blazer only has 3/4 sleeves.  This desire for specificity led to labels like “empire waist scoop neck knee length racerback tank dress.”  Here’s a picture of that one.  Looks a lot simpler than it sounds, huh?

black dress with purple necklace

To help me focus, I decided that unless I find something outside the rules but mind-bogglingly perfect, my purchases for the foreseeable future will be in certain shades of the primary colors: true red, a dark pink-red I call “berry,” mustard yellow (in both its greenish and brownish varieties), and navy; along with green (emerald and olive), and neutrals (black, gray, and ivory–I don’t like the way I look in white, wedding dress notwithstanding).  I discovered through trial and error that all these colors are ones I will wear.  I used to buy lots of royal blue, which is lovely and looks okay on me, but for whatever I reason I would not wear those pieces.  So, like a genius, I decided to quit buying them.

*I only included things others might see me wear, so pajamas etc. were not on the lists.  Neither was jewelry because it’s so easily mix-and-matchable.

Master List

There’s also a fashion Master List.  It includes everything I need to keep in mind as I make new purchases.  For example, I’m trying to stay really focused with new purchases after years of using “the more the merrier” as my wardrobe philosophy.  (And “the cheaper, the better” as my runner-up philosophy.)

donation pile

The Master List expands upon the basic color guide, specifying things like which patterns I like/am looking for: stripes and florals top the list while animal print is under cautious consideration.  This list also details the materials I prefer and the way I want clothes to fit–for example, cardigans must fall right at my hip and have some structure to them.  Cropped, boyfriend, and shapeless are out!

Along with each description of how something should fit, the Master List specifies pieces I am hunting for–so in the Pants category my list includes “olive pants” and “leggings,” since my current pair have sprung a couple holes.

At the end I’ve listed some upcoming things I need outfits for–summer weddings and trips, plus other activities, like working out, that I have really nasty clothes for and would like to have cuter ones that I actually want to wear.  Because if I have cute workout clothes I will finally exercise, right?  (Hahaha.)

Outfit Recipes

I love to cook, bake, and plan the perfect menu for company, and I approach getting dressed in a similar way.  Certain combinations of ingredients win every time, even if the ingredients are simple.  On my Outfit Recipes list, I’ve saved some ideas I return to time and again–and new ones that have inspired me.

I name all these too, so I can remember them later.  Here are a few:

-trifecta—three solid colors together (I believe fashion bloggers prefer to call this “color blocking.” I think “trifecta” is a much cooler word.)

{trifecta} with berry, mustard, and emerald

-double take—repeat one color against a neutral backdrop (belt & shoes; cardigan & jewelry; hat & shoes, etc.)  Here it’s more subtle than I intended but the “repeat” is cognac leather.  My shoes, belt, and cuff are all leather, and I meant to grab my leather bag but I forgot!

{double take} mustard scarf, striped shirt, and leather accents

-neutral + sweet & soft (taupe + blush, ivory + coral/floral)

-neutral + big & bright (gray + yellow, taupe + tangerine, ivory/pink + emerald green)

That’s all pretty general, but this list has an exacting side too.  (Are you surprised?!)  To help me a.) envision outfits from my current wardrobe b.) see which pieces I could add to get more mileage out of what I already have, I’ve copied the details from some blog posts like Tania’s “8 Outfits, 1 Very Small Suitcase.”  Here’s what that looks like:

With these pieces:
-cardigan
-blazer
-dress
-skirt
-jeans
-tights
-striped top
-white top
-checkered top (tiny plaid)
-belt
-boots
-flats
-solid scarf
-printed scarf
She made these outfits:
-dress+cardi+belt+tights+boots
-striped top+blazer+jeans+belt+scarf+boots
-solid top+cardi+jeans+scarf+boots
-striped top+skirt+tights+flats
-dress+blazer+tights+flats
-white top+skirt+belt+tights+boots(opt: blazer)
-checked top+cardi+jeans+flats

“Wardrobe From Scratch” List

If you’re tired of my list of lists, feel free to skip forward! There are three more (counting this one).  This one is thanks to Audrey from Putting Me Together, my newest fashion-blog love.  She’s in the midst of writing a complete “Wardrobe From Scratch” series and I’m following along as she releases new challenges.  So far, at her prompting, I’ve listed my daily activities and defined my style preferences with the help of a big pinning session (here).  The analysis is in this list.  If you like Audrey’s blog, be sure to read the “Building a Remixable Wardrobe” series too!

The NO List

This list cracks me up!  Sometimes I write things on it in self-disgust–as in, “Self, why, fortheloveofPete, would you buy anything made of denim that is not in the shape of a pair of jeans?  Don’t even think about it!  In fact, write it on the NO list!”

This list keeps me in check when the trends are getting a little out of control.  It reminds me that no matter what InStyle, Kendi, and Pinterest say, pastels only look good on other people and overalls are just never going to be a good idea.  Sometimes on shopping trips I am liable to forget these really obvious things.  Having gone through the motion of writing it down helps cement it in my brain.  No hi-lo hem lines! No vertical stripes–bad call!

The YES List

Okay, it’s obvious what this is.  Shawl collars!  Rounded-toe flats!  Belted natural waist!  Everything on this list is a winner, so I try to look for more of these things–or when looking for things, make sure they have more of these attributes.  I also include things like “outfits with contrast” (e.g. short, long—natural-waist maxi skirt with fitted top/short shorts with long sleeved shirt/skinnies with a tunic//shiny, rough—sequined top with cable cardigan & jeans).  Thus concludes the list of lists.  We now proceed to…

WORKING THE STORE

Is it just me, or do you also make a beeline for the clearance rack before you look at anything else?  In most stores the clearance is furthest from the door–smart cookies, those retailers–but I always head there first if I’m shopping alone.  If I don’t like the prices there, the rest of the store is going to be a waste of my time.

I do this online too.  I always sort a search from lowest priced to highest priced.  This is not to be confused with lowest discount to highest discount, which some sites have–80% off an expensive item may still turn out to be a higher price than 50% off a less expensive item.  I’ll look through page after page of results until the price point becomes one I am unwilling to pay.  Then I haven’t wasted any time looking at, or falling forlornly in love with, items I can’t afford right now.  Which leads to…

SPENDING CAPS

I’m curious to know if anyone else has “magic numbers.”  I realize this is a really personal thing and it is not my intent to pry.  I just think we all come at this a little differently based on how we were raised, what our income is, and where and how often we shop.  I have mental limits for how much I will usually spend on certain items.  There are exceptions, but they’re rare.

$10 or less:

-all tops including sweaters. To me these seem a dime a dozen.  Plus they’re easy to change out as trends come and go.  The same jeans can hold me for five years, but I’ll probably go through dozens of tops in that time so I don’t want to really invest in them.

-scarves. They’re fun to have and they’re a great warm layer, but I just don’t see myself ever dropping the big bucks for a scarf.  I’ve found several pashminas (huge and soft!) for $6-$7 at a local consignment shop.  They make pretty table runners too, FYI.

-bags. I always get bags at the thrift store because I switch a lot. I don’t need to find one purrfect investment bag because I’m not going to use and abuse it hard enough to justify the splurge. A little secondhand Talbots is fine with me.

-jewelry. I love having lots of bright jewelry to make a plain outfit interesting, but I never want anything precious that would make me really sad to lose or damage. If I’m that attached to an object I’ve invested too much into it. My favorite pieces right now are bangles I got on clearance from Ten Thousand Villages.

$20 to $30:

-all pants. My favorite jeans I bought new are a.n.a skinnies from J.C. Penney. I paid $20.

a.n.a. skinny jeans

My favorite jeans I bought secondhand are CK jeans from a local thrift store. I paid $5.  It just takes patience.

-dresses. I used to nanny so I bought about 20 dresses because they were easy, breezy, and well…not always that beautiful.  Some of them were truly regrettable little numbers, especially the one that snapped a strap while I was pushing the wee one on a swing at the park.  Now I demand a little more from my dresses.  They have to go with a few things–a cardigan, a blazer, a pair of tights, and flats, plus either boots or heels–no more one-outfit wonders.  And when I look at how sundress straps are secured, I now look for metal rings and double-stitching.

$20 to $60:

-shoes. I will spend more money for a pair of shoes than for anything else in my closet.  Being comfortable is worth it to me.  I look for padded insoles, rubber (or other non-slip) outsoles, genuine leather uppers, and pleasing aesthetics.  This is a rare combo, which is why I buy shoes much more carefully than I used to.  My old pattern was to grab whatever was cute at Payless or Target, preferably for $20 or less.  Now not so much…but I have found shoes for $30 when they were originally $100, so I know waiting pays off.  I just never know when it will.

LOOK ONLINE FIRST

Part of my long hunting process involves looking online before I go to a store.  I like to touch things and try them on, and I’ve never been a sucker for the free shipping myth.  (It is a myth, believe me, much as I love Zappos.  They’re great fun, but you have to know what the item sells for elsewhere and make sure you aren’t paying extra for “free” shipping.)  I will do site-to-store shipping, though.  And I’ll pay shipping for something I really want that I don’t think I can find in a store.  For example, Sierra Trading Post is one of my favorite places to find shoes.  (The first I bought and sent back because the heel zipper dug in; the second I bought and love…and I paid much less than they are currently listed for.)

earth-paprika-sandal{SierraTradingPost} pajar-ice-boots{SierraTradingPost}

Online I check what colors are currently “in.”  Sometimes I look at a store’s website and see all pastels or all neons–for example, Target will often have a great deal on basic tee shirts but every single color option is one I know will look terrible on me.  They haven’t seemed to carry the “true” colors in a while.

Target teesIf that’s what I see, I won’t spend time in that store.  On the other hand, if I see something that interests me, I’ll note the online price and maybe experimentally add the item to my cart and proceed to checkout to find out the shipping price.  That’s the price to beat if I can.

In the store, if the item meets my expectations, I’ll look at its price.  Sometimes there are online specials that beat the store price even with shipping factored in.  Other times my local store is having a sale that doesn’t apply online–for example, a dress I looked at on Old Navy’s web site a couple weeks ago was “on sale” online for $27–plus shipping.  In the store the same dress was $25–no shipping.  (Duh; I know; I was just making a point.)

If I decide to buy online, I should always check Retail Me Not before I check out.  I say “should” because I sometimes forget.  Shame on me.  I recently missed out on a 30% discount at Sierra Trading Post because I clicked “Place Order” about five seconds before my Smart Shopper Alarm went, “BLOO!!!*BLOO!!!*BLOO!!!”

Oh well; I win some, I lose some.  I tried to just tell myself I was happy with the price, which is why I was ordering in the first place, but a miserable little part of me is still in the corner chanting, “But you could have been happier with the price!”

My last secret to shopping sanity is not getting too attached.  Sometimes they don’t have it in my size.  Or my color.  Sometimes I look at it in the morning, think about it during the afternoon, and go to order it in the evening but it’s sold out in stores and permanently out of stock online.

sold out

That’s just the way it is.  There will be another one someday.  Maybe a better one.  And I can keep my mind off of it in the meantime by, I don’t know, making another list?

How about you?  What are your tried-and-true strategies for finding a deal?  And how do you decide when a cheap item is a bargain versus a waste of money, or when an expensive item is an investment piece versus…well, you know, a waste of money?

going green…literally

So far spring hasn’t been offering us much in the way of sunshiney days, so I was like a cat ready to pounce by the time a gorgeous afternoon came my way.  I gauged the wind and decided it was time to paint a patio set that had weathered a winter wait.  Lovey and I took a walk to the hardware store for “international green” spray paint.  I think it’s meant for farm implements, but whatever.

a few supplies

I unbolted all the legs, seats, chair backs, and table tops, spread them out on a tarp, and went to work.

patio set parts ready to be painted

I sprayed multiple very, very thin coats until I achieved a solid covering of green over each piece, much to the amusement of the (perhaps slightly crazy?) neighbor who watched from his balcony and occasionally offered tidbits like, “You know that $h!* will kill you, right?”–judging me for spraypainting (with a mask on!) while he stood above me (smoking!).

a sea of green

I left the pieces on the apartment lawn for a while, then retrieved them as the sun started to go down.  I laid them out on our balcony, hoping it would be okay to move them before the paint cured completely.

final drying

The moving didn’t seem to be a problem, but wouldn’t you know that night it rained!  Can’t win ‘em all, I guess.  The paint got a little spotty but I don’t think it’s too bad.  With some weathering it should be even less noticeable.  When it gets consistently warm I hope to set a little pot of flowers on the table, but I won’t get ahead of myself on that one.  It might still snow; who knows?

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 27 other followers